The Ridge

Welcome Wednesday

2011-07-06T08:22:00.000-06:00

Enjoy your stay here on the Ridge, and Welcome! It's Wednesday!

-Tracy

A New Solo Dress

2011-07-06T07:15:00.000-06:00

After many, many hours of research, Panda and I finally agreed on a solo dress we both liked. Downside: it is clearly out of the budget! We have a $500 budget, and the dress we like is $750. (Okay, okay, so there are tons of dresses that we like that are out of budget, but this one just "speaks" to me, you know??)
So I have emailed current owner, since it says to make an offer. Hopefully, she will accept what we've offered!!

I'm not angry anymore

2011-07-05T21:27:00.002-06:00

Okay, so I just read over my last year or so of blogposts.
Yikes.
I have been one angry and disgruntled woman. I suppose it was a mid-life crisis of sorts.
These posts would've been me talking at the height of learning to deal with Clinical Depression, and I hope not to go back there again. I have deleted some of the more serious offenses.
I am thankful for the Lord in my life, and for his ever-present love. As I was feeling alone and abandoned, I realize now how much He was looking out for ME!! The poem "Footprints In the Sand" has taken on a new, personal meaning. Although many of us have read it many times, it bears repeating:

Footprints

One night I had a dream--
I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord
and across the sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene I noticed two sets of footprints,
one belonged to me and the other to the Lord.
When the last scene of my life flashed before me,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that many times along the path of my life,
there was only one set of footprints.
I also noticed that it happened at the very lowest
and saddest times in my life.
This really bothered me and I questioned the Lord about it.
"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you would walk with me all the way,
but I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life
there is only one set of footprints.
"I don't understand why in times when I needed you most,
you should leave me."
The Lord replied, "My precious, precious child,
I love you and I would never, never leave you
during your times of trial and suffering.
"When you saw only one set of footprints,
it was then that I carried you."

...Mary Stevenson

Uh, it's been a while, hasn't it?

2009-12-15T14:44:00.002-07:00

Well, now, we all slack off sometimes, don't we?
Rather than spend 20 pages trying to update recent events in our household, I thought I'd share with you our family Christmas letter. (If you've received it already at home, I apologize for the repeat.)

Sprout- This has been an eventful year! He has earned his Tenderfoot, Second Class and First Class ranks in Boy Scouts, as well as 7 merit badges! He has started the Sixth grade, and has his favorite teacher again! Sprout has found a new passion in fishing, and wishes we lived near a fishing hole. He also loves hiking, camping, and backpacking. He has lots of friends and enjoys hanging out and playing video games with them. He also received the Aaronic Priesthood, which is a big step in a Mormon boy's life.

Panda- She advanced to Beginner II in Irish Dance. She worked really hard for this achievement. It means she gets to dance in "hard shoes" now!! She attended 3 feisanna (Irish Dance Competitions) this year, and earned a bunch of medals. She is now ready for a Team Dress, which is a really big step in our Irish Dance School. Panda is in the Fourth grade and adores her teacher. Our Panda loves to bake brownies, cakes cookies, etc. You name and she wants to bake it!! She hope sit be a pastry chef and Irish Dance Teacher when she grows up!

LuLu - Our little girl is all grown up! She is in the Second grade and is an amazing reader! She is even in the "hard" math class. Felicity has attended 2 feisanna this year, and earned some medals and even a TROPHT for her reel! She has just started "hard shoes" but hasn't danced in them yet (just some drills.) She also gets a Team Dress (At $500 a piece, we have some saving to do!) LuLu is adored by everyone she meets, and we are frequently told what a wonderful girl she is. She loves to play house, go to school, and her sister is her best friend. When she grows up she wants to be a mom, just like me!! We love our LuLu!

DH Mark - Kilts, Cabers and meat pies. This is our life now. The Scottish Highland games have taken over our summers. Mark loves to compete in this strong-man sport, and we love to be there to support him. He earned several medals this year, and placed 2nd in the Utah Caber Championship. We hope he will be able to spend more time at home with us soon.

Me- I volunteer frequently at the kid's school, shuttle the girls to Irish dance and Sprout to scouts! I love to read, and was so happy when Diana Gabaldon's newest installment in the Outlander series came out in September. (I was sorely disappointed with it though. ) I am the Southern Area Coordinator for our Irish Dance School and spend a lot of time with performances, competitions and helping new parents navigate the world of Irish Dance. It's an obsession, but I LOVE LOVE LOVE Irish Dance and love to watch my girls do it! Mark calls me his Talladega Queen because I yell and holler and make a general nuisance of myself while cheering him on in the Scottish Highland games. It is so fun to cheer them all on in their endeavors.

Family Update, 2009!!
Hope you enjoyed it!

SLAINTE!

Nothing says I love you like a clean toilet

2009-09-15T11:52:00.002-06:00

My mantra for years has been: "Nothing says I love you like a clean toilet!" (thank you Flylady)
You'd think someone in my household would pick up on this after a few YEARS of saying this.
Well, finally a miracle has come to pass.
Before my husband left for Wyoming, he scrubbed my toilets, and left me a note that says: I love you so much I cleaned the toilets.
What a romantic guy.
I'd take pictures and show you, but I don't want you to be jealous.

Crockpot Enchiladas

2009-09-02T13:20:00.002-06:00

1 lb. ground beef (I leave this out sometimes. I don't love to eat a lot of meat.)
1 med. onion sauteed
1/2 tsp Adobo seasoning (you can use garlic salt instead)
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper
4 flour tortillas
1 10 oz can red enchilada sauce
1 can Rotel tomatoes and green chiles, undrained
2 cups shredded cheese (cheddar, mozzarella, a mexican blend, whatever you have on hand.)

In a bowl, combine ground beef, onion, adobo seasoning, salt and pepper. In another bowl, mix the Rotel and enchilada sauce. Place 2 tortillas in the bottom of the slow cooker. Place half of the following in layers over the tortillas: meat, sauce mixture, and cheese. Repeat layers. Cook on low for 4-5 hours.

A fun variation: use shredded chicken and green enchilada sauce instead of ground beef and red sauce. I'd actually cut out the tomatoes/green chiles and use 2 cans of green sauce.

I hope you enjoy!

cooler weather, cooler tempers

2009-08-09T19:24:00.002-06:00

Heat really brings out the anger in me. I cannot be bothered with cheerfulness when I'm hot. I just don't have the energy nor the desire to do so. The last few days have been lovely in the weather department, and with that my temper has cooled off as well. I'd say my children are quite pleased. For me, however, I have quite enjoyed the cooler temps by getting something done that I have long put off. Sleep. That's right. The last few days I have slept through the night, at least 10 hours at a stretch and I have managed to put in a few naps that have been over 2 hours long. I feel like a new woman.
Now, if we can just convince mother nature to not go back to the heat...

birth of a caber bunny

2009-08-05T13:49:00.002-06:00

It's official. The Caber Bunnies (me and Abby... still waiting for Lorri to follow suit) will make their first appearance at the Cache Valley Scottish Games.
I just hope I don't make a complete dork of myself when I'm there, because my muscles are regretting my choice already.

a day to myself

2009-07-27T10:27:00.002-06:00

Taking advantage of unemployment, Mark has taken the children to the mountains today. This is a two-fold blessing. One, he always complains that he doesn't get to spend enough time in the mountains, and two, he always complains that he doesn't get to spend enough time with the children. Two birds, one stone.
Kind soul that he is, he also has allowed me a day at home to suffer alone in the heat, rather than dealing with others who are also resigned to a similar fate as I. I hope he remembered to take the camera.

MEN MORE LIKELY TO DIE FROM HEAT

2009-07-17T23:27:00.002-06:00

I found an interesting article today put out by ABC News. It states: The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has issued a review of heat-related deaths in the United States from 1999 to 2003, finding that an average of 688 people die from heat-related illnesses each year. Men are much more likely to die from the heat than women -- for every three heat deaths, two are male.

I find it interesting that they blame the deaths on HEAT as opposed to their wives who killed their cheap-a** husbands for not getting them air conditioners. So, remember, if my husband dies, do not blame me, blame the HEAT.

Bombshell, tonight (ala Nancy Grace)

2009-07-08T22:51:00.003-06:00

My husband informs me tonight: "I might have to go to work in Wyoming."

"What's a few weeks apart," I say, "as long as you are employed."

"Umm... it'll be a 1 year commitment and I'll have to be living up there", he says. "You and the kids can come up and visit me on the weekends."

"(cricket, cricket...silence)". I say nothing as I stare at him in disbelief.

Well, having to live apart is better than having him unemployed, I suppose. . Why can't life just be easier than this?

Heat so thick, like a blanket

2009-07-05T20:43:00.002-06:00

After weeks of complaining about the rain, it's now time to complain about the oppressive heat.
Okay, so it's not oppressive, but for those of us who are accustomed to temperature-controlled environments, being at the mercy of Mother Nature is... oppressive.
I just keep telling myself "I had fun at Disneyland, I had fun at Disneyland" in hopes that the memories alone will bring cool breezes wafting past me.

endless rain

2009-06-22T13:59:00.002-06:00

This is how I'm feeling after all these weeks of ENDLESS rain, rain, rain. I thought we lived in a desert.

Ye'll ken you're a man when you're wearing a kilt

2009-06-16T10:24:00.010-06:00

This weekend was the Utah Scottish Festival.
What a blast!
We went Friday night to the Military Tattoo and Concert.
These pictures give a brief idea of how large the massed bands were. There were over 120 Pipe bands. It was amazing!

Shortly thereafter, the rain came down, and the floods came up! (The mud anyway!) We couldn't resist dancing in the rain to the Wicked Tinkers though!

Then on Saturday, Mark competed in the Scottish Heavy Games. He did soooo good!

See his kilt twirling? I love it when the kilt twirls.

This is Mark and his friend Mike. Mike kicks Mark's butt. Mike always gets third. Mark always gets fourth. His goal is to beat Mike in at least one event.

Sprout and Panda participated in the children's Highland Games. Sprout even turned the Caber! Way to go, buddy!

Lulu beat the Giant! She loved it!
The best part of the whole day came after this:

Mark turned the caber on all three tries. He got third place and earned his FIRST (and only) medal! (Not to mention he beat Mike!)

such a sweet boy...

2009-06-12T14:20:00.002-06:00

I went to my son's Parent Teacher Conference a few days ago. One of their projects was to make an epitaph on a grave stone for themselves.
Most kids said things like Here lies Joe Jonas, world's greatest musician, or Orel Herschizer, best baseball hero ever, or listed lines and lines of their greatness. How great to have such wonderful lofty goals. It warmed my heart.
And then I saw my son's and I nearly cried.
It said "Here lies Sprout, who made a difference for people with learning disabilities."
I love my Sprout. :)

crick in the neck

2009-06-04T23:05:00.002-06:00

I have been suffering with a "crick in the neck." Granted, I did it to myself because I fell asleep on the sofa, using the armrest as a pillow, and well, quite frankly, was asking for trouble.
You know what I thought would be funny, is to type in crick in the neck and google it. Little did I know that it's practically a medical term! Not really, but EVERYONE calls it a crick in the neck! Not only that, but treatment for a "crick" is controversial.
I've discovered that it's considered to be
a) muscle spasm
b) arthritis
c) sprained neck ligament
d) pinched nerve
So one doctor says to stretch and massage, another says to ice, isolate and rest, a third suggests cortizone shots and muscle relaxers.

They ALL claim that the other "treatments" won't help! Geez, Louise! So, I'll just keep icing my neck, because that's what I think will help it. Maybe a muscle relaxer just to help me sleep. :) Oh, but most importantly, I think I'll sleep in bed now so I don't wrench my neck while sleeping again. I just saved myself a trip to the doctor (and therefore $80!)

when Irish eyes are smiling

2009-06-02T14:06:00.005-06:00

Lulu's Irish eyes are smiling!! We went to see Dr. Hoffman at Primary Children's Medical Center today, and we got GREAT NEWS! Her bilateral eye muscles are continuing to improve, and she didn't need a new eyeglass prescription! The doctor says she is "straddling the fence" and has good control with her eyes, and they seem to be working together. It has been a long road of eye problems, having originally seen the doctor when she was 3 months old. Even when she has her glasses off now, they don't cross! It brings tears to my eyes.
I am so grateful to live in a time when these things can be repaired. 50 years ago there was no way to save her eyesight, and she would have gone blind in one, if not both, her eyes. Praise the Lord for medical advances. My Irish eyes are smiling too!

Poultry Obsession

2009-06-01T21:16:00.005-06:00

He can't stop himself. He came home with 2 more baby chicks today. This time he brought home 2 black sex-links. (Let me tell you how nervous I was searching this online. I just knew Google would be all kinds of inappropriate. Good thing it's a common chicken breed.)

The 2 new ladies have been named:
Root Beer. Panda says this is what they smell like. She needs a nose-ectomy.
Rose. They don't smell like this either, by the way.
If we're naming them from scent their names should be Crap and Poop. :)

it's so hard to say goodbye...

2009-05-30T08:46:00.002-06:00

I finished A Breath of Snow and Ashes last night.
Goodbye Jamie, goodbye Claire.
I'll see (read) you again in September.
I'll miss you.

5...4...6?

2009-05-28T17:40:00.003-06:00

Disappointed in the cat-killer news, Mark decided to stop by the farm supply store and bring home...
2 more Buff Orpington chicks.
I think I'm in chick-overload right now. I can't take it.
He also brought home smaller chicken wire and is changing the coop to be more chick-friendly and less cat-accessible.
Now, I have 2 more names to come up with. I suppose I will revive Mo, but the other one... I guess I'll have to think about it.

and then there were 4

2009-05-28T15:47:00.003-06:00

Mai-mai is so busted. He killed himself a baby chick. Shhhh... the kids don't know because they weren't here when I got them, or when the death occurred.
And some of the names are changed.
Sprout kept his name the same. Buffy. It is after all a buff orpington.
Panda changed hers from Betsy to Tacy. (next thing you know it's name'll be Tib.)
LuLu kept her name the same. Lemon.
Now, which one was murdered in cold-blood? It was either Penny or Mo. I can't tell them apart. I guess it was Mo. I want to have a chicken named Penny, as in Henny Penny.

Proud Mother of 5

2009-05-28T09:46:00.005-06:00

I have 5 new babies.

Their names are: Penny, Betsy, Lemon, M.O. (mademoiselle l'oef), Buffy.

They are all Buff Orpington Hens. According to my research, Buff Orpingtons are gentle, docile, and make the best pets. They are also dual purpose chickens, which means they are good eggers and they are good meat (although I will not be cooking up my pets for Sunday dinner.)

I hope they survive their first night on The Ridge.

Oliver might have other plans.

the never-ending cough

2009-05-24T16:23:00.003-06:00

Yup. I still got it. This interminable cough that won't go away. I've taken everything under the sun, including antibiotics, and nothing is working. I think I am going to lose my mind.
Right now as I sit here looking up home remedies for coughing (nothing sounds viable yet) I am listening to the sounds of a lazy Sunday afternoon.
Cartoons are on in the Living Room, with minimal chatter and a bit of laughter from the children. I hear the cats meowing to go outside, but they are denied this today. (Mai-mai got in to rare wee fight with another cat and has the marks to prove it, and Max, well, he just needs some time inside after carousing all night.)
Mark has woken from a nap, after having overdosed on allergy medication. Oliver having been woken, is irritated that his own nap with Mark has been disturbed. It's just another, typical quiet Sunday. My family is all safely gathered in, and I am fairly content.
Now, answer me this, do you want to drink apple cider vinegar, drink boiled onion water and honey, gargle white pepper,or drink milk with 3 cloves of garlic? Eww, eww, eww, eww, and eww. I guess I'll be back to the doctor on Tuesday. (Can you hear the heavy sigh?)

depression, depression, depression

2009-05-21T13:52:00.003-06:00

Another bad day over here at depression central. Lack of motivation, desire for extra carbohydrates, need for excessive sleep, hmm... reads like a "do you have depression" quiz if you ask me.
I don't really want to do anything about it, other than wallow in my depression, I found a website that I think has some good advice. Really, really, really good advice. (You see, it's easier to look for advice than to actually follow said advice.)

Dealing with Depression: Self help and coping tips

My favorite sentence on this website sums up dealing with depression quite succinctly: "It’s the Catch-22 of depression recovery. The things that help the most are the things that are most difficult to do."

What I am going to do with this advice, is start easy for me. I'm going to increase my B vitamins and start taking a chromium supplement. Also, I'm thinking about taking the dog for a walk. The research does say that a 10 minute walk can improve your mood for up to 2 hours. Now I have to decide if the plantar fasciitis can handle a warm afternoon walk, or if I should wait until the sun goes down to take the walk. Can my mood wait that long? Dilemma, dilemma.

What do you think Oliver?

Yea, that's what I thought. You'll be ready to go whenever I want. Smoochie, smoochie, poochie, poochie.

Folk Alley

2009-05-20T08:54:00.002-06:00

My newest obsession: American Folk Music
Try listening to my new favorite online radio station, Folk Alley.
Folk Alley

Although I enjoy it quite a bit, at times it's too contemporary for my tastes. That's when I turn to this site:The Contemplator
I sing at the top of my lungs, and I can kill hours of time doing this.

And just when I've had my fill of American folk music, I turn to this online radio station: Highland Radio

Just a little proof that I am odd. As if you needed any.

Mother's Day

2009-05-13T07:27:00.003-06:00

Mother's Day. My children worked so hard to make this day special.
Sprout made chocolate covered strawberries for me at school.
Panda made a "coupon book" at activity days.
LuLu made me 3 cards at home.
My husband gave me a gift certificate for a massage. mmmm. I can't wait.
I manage to hold in the tears through this part. Then we go to church.
Sawyer cries. (argument with dad.)
Grace cries. (argument with dad.)
Only LuLu gets up to sing the primary song. (Why do they always try to get the kids to sing a song they don't know???)
The words of a poem read at church last week fill my mind.

You are the trip I did not take;
You are the pearls I cannot buy;
You are my blue Italian lake;
You are my piece of foreign sky.

That's it. We're outta here. We went home to collect ourselves, wipe our tear-stained faces (and then head back to church.)

Was it a good day?

Certainly. After my man grilled me up some steaks (yum!) and we headed to my friend Erika's for dessert and games. I would sum it up as an almost perfect day.

oh where, oh where has my little camera gone?

2009-05-08T16:11:00.006-06:00

I wondered where my camera disappeared to, and now that it's found, I discovered some interesting snapshots taken by my children.

I love this one of Mad Max

What? I can't hear you over the screaming!

2009-05-07T10:27:00.003-06:00

Do you know what I hate?
Screaming children.
me:"What is your problem, stop the screaming already!" (I say, screaming.)
Sprout: "Her ear hurts."
me: "Who's ear hurts? Why does it hurt?"
Panda: "Lulu. She's screaming that her ear hurts."
Ugh. Drama Queen, I think to myself. I grab the eardrops and put a few in. She goes to sleep on the sofa.
Thank God, I think, I don't know how much more of that screaming I can take! Can't she just deal with it like a normal person. [duh, mom, she's 6!]

20 minutes later: Blood curdling scream from the Living Room
me: "What is it now?!?"
Lulu: "My ear!"
Mark: (while walking in)"what is all the screaming about?"
...you get the idea.
After 2 1/2 hours of screaming, I say, I'm taking her to the Instacare to make sure it's not an ear infection. I can't take all this screaming!

1 hour wait at instacare. Diagnosis: middle ear infection. Her ear is hugely swollen and very painful. They give her analgesic drops in her ear, give me a prescription for antibiotics and send me on my way. Poor kid didn't sleep a wink last night.

You know what I hate?
When you're in a lot of pain and no one believes you. Despite your screaming. No one seems to care. ::heavy sigh:: Sometimes I feel like a jerk.

Sept 22- so close and yet so far away

2009-05-02T22:08:00.004-06:00

I am so very excited (jumping up and down!) that the next book in the Outlander series is coming out Sept 22, 2009! (jumping up and down!) Just to make sure that I am ready for it...I have started the series all over again. I get so happy just thinking about it that I start jumping up and down.
Thanks, Erika, for introducing me to these books. I just don't know what Mark and I would talk about without them...
Which reminds me. I missed the feast of beltane this year. It was yesterday. What was I thinking????

You can check it all out for yourself:
Diana Gabladon

Fat Tuesday

2009-04-28T14:08:00.005-06:00

After our trip to Disneyland and looking at the photos, I have been forced to confront something about myself I've been trying to avoid.
I am fat.
I am not overweight, I do not just have extra preganancy weight. I am a bonfide non-exercising, over-eating fat person.
I need to deal with this issue. I know I eat when I'm bored, lonely, sad, happy, nervous... for any reason. I recognize I eat for emotional reasons. I assume my depression doesn't help in this issue, but I need to stop using it as my excuse. Both my parents have type II diabetes, I have high-blood pressure (and probably high cholesterol, but I refuse to go in and take that test from the doctor.) I am a ticking time-bomb.
So, I've decided that this will be my regular Tuesday feature. I call it Fat Tuesday because
a)that's funny to me and
b)it will be easier for me to remember.

I intend to discuss some of my emotional over-eating issues, confront myself about my laziness, and refer to information that I have found that hopefully will help me in my quest to improve my health.
I hope to find some form of exercise that is entertaining and interesting for me that I can do even with plantar fasciitis.
I hope to find a way to overcome my nighttime eating problem.
I hope that I will stick on this path until I find the health and happiness I am seeking.

don't mock me....(mock feis 2009)

2009-04-27T14:46:00.008-06:00

Photos from this year's mock feis. Hopefully we are now prepared for June's competition! Wish us luck!

Before the wig:

This is my favorite photo of Lulu at the mock feis:

Panda, turn out your feet. Panda! Panda! Panda! Turn out your feet! How many times did I yell this (or signal this) to her this day? I was ready to pull my hair out! (notice her feet, just standing there?)

Even your baby sister can stand turned out, Panda!

Finally! She does it! Go, Panda! Go, Panda! Go, Panda! (notice the feet?! Success!)

Single man turns 40

2009-04-27T09:38:00.007-06:00

My brother turned 40 this year! Holy stinkin' cow. That means my turn is right around the corner!

He's single ladies!

Hanging with Uncle Tim!

We won a lovely gumball in the game machine while waiting for the cousins to arrive!

The dinner party at Golden Corral. See, the smart girl takes the photos and doesn't have to be in them.

Friday Night Pizza and Pool

2009-04-25T19:52:00.003-06:00

We have a standing date with our kids to go out to Pizza and go swimming at the community pool every friday night. Well, unless we have other things going on, but when we don't this is what we do.
Last night my girls had a "late over" with a friend from school. (Not a sleep over, the friend can stay until 10 pm, but we can all get some sleep that way!) That's too many girls for my son, so he slept over at Gramma's house and played Guitar Hero with Uncle Tim all night.

Anyone can grow zucchini?!?!

2009-04-24T13:51:00.004-06:00

My friend Jan decided I needed to plant a garden. So she brought me these seeds she had planted. Well, it's been about a week now, and I've managed to keep them watered appropriately, and if you look closely....

you can see a little tiny shoot coming up in the top left hand corner of this one!
I just might see some zucchini yet!

Another day, another cupboard

2009-04-23T14:26:00.005-06:00

Okay, so I figure it's time to get cracking on another cupboard. So, here's my before picture. (See, Erika, I do have messy cupboards!)

I spent my 10 minutes cleaning it out. Okay, I'll be honest this one took more like 12 minutes, because the timer went off and I wasn't quite done putting everything back. This is the end result of this cupboard:

Granted, this isn't as dramatic a change, but I DID manage to find all my measuring cups. I didn't know I had so many, but the benefit of having lost them all is that the kids do know that if you use 1/4 measuring cup 3x it does equal 3/4 cup! That is progress! I did find that I had two cheese graters. WHY?? I don't even buy block cheese, I buy it already grated!
I know you are dying to know whether or not I've managed to keep the other cupboard organized, so I took a picture of it. Keep in mind Sawyer is in charge of emptying the dishwasher:

Not bad! You'll notice all the bowls are together, all the plates are together, and all the cups are together. Perhaps not as neatly as I would have done it, but beggars (or mothers) can't be too choosy. At 2 cupboards a week, I am on a roll, baby!

Spring Cleaning

2009-04-20T10:53:00.005-06:00

Several months ago I was watching an episode of Oprah and there was a show about organizing your life. This particular one struck me as plausible for my life, because it was about taking 10 minutes at a time to do something to get organized. Today I started because there is no time like the present (and a depression-less day)!
Open up a disorganized cupboard:

Spend 10 minutes throwing out unused items and grouping like items together.
When you are all done you have something like this:

and you end up throwing away or giving away a bunch of stuff like this:

Are you kidding me? Look at all those sippy cups, and a bottle? My youngest is 6 years old, and she was breast-fed exclusively??? Now, the reality is, I only have junky plastic cups, and need to get something nicer to drink out of. Even if they are plastic, it would be nice if they would all match!

Forgive me, for I have sinned

2009-04-20T10:39:00.004-06:00

So after a week of snow, overcast and cloudy skies and a depression fog that wouldn't give up it's grip, along comes Sunday. Beautiful blue skies, warm weather that screams "SPRING" and the thought of going to church for 3 LOOONNNNGGG hours threatens to kill my budding good mood.
Forgive me, fellow mormons, but I couldn't resist a day in the sunshine having fun with my family. We took the kids to the Lagoon Amusement Park, and had a fabulous sun-filled, fun-filled day. And I don't even feel guilty about it. I can't help but think that the Lord understands when I need a break from the same-old same-old. I know, I know, I know, I just came home from vacation, but that's what reminded me that I need to loosen up and have some more fun. It's like President Hinckley said, "Life is to be enjoyed, not just endured."

Enjoy these photos of our "day off" from church!

Spring has sprung!

2009-04-18T11:55:00.004-06:00

What a glorious spring day it is!
I have thrown open the windows and embraced the sunshine. Goodbye, dark clouds of gloom that bring the snow and the cold and the depression. So far today has been a good day. Such a change from the days just prior to this one that kept me cold and asleep and lonely.
We got back our Panda's IEP information, and it's good to know that she's not too far behind in math, but they are going to give her some added support anyway. What a joy. Now, the decision whether or not to homeschool this sweet child looms. She wants to be homeschooled, but we are concerned about her being bored, because when Panda gets bored, Panda gets curious, and when Panda gets curious, Panda finds trouble. (I'm thinking this could be a book....)

Girl's Night Out

2009-04-15T09:10:00.002-06:00

Yesterday my friend Jan and I went on our annual girl's night out at the the pasta plant. We went to dinner at Chili's and then, afterwards we went and worked at the Deseret Pasta Plant for 4 hours! Not only did we get a girl's night out, not have to cook dinner, but we got to buy our annual supply of pasta for our families AND do some good for the poor in our community. What a fun satisfying evening. Of course thanks to my Plantar fasciitis I won't be walking for a few days. It was worth it though!

Depression rears it's ugly head

2009-04-14T12:56:00.002-06:00

It's been a while since I've had a "depressive episode." A day when all I want to do is sleep and eat and cry. It's about time I had one, isn't it? Well, guess what? I am! I have slept all day long, having woken up only to feed and clothe my children and drive them to school. I have slept since I got home, and all I want to do is take something to make me sleep even more.
What is particularly disconcerting to me is that I have all the safety nets in place to keep from having this episode. I have something to look forward to later in the day even, but I can't seem to shake it. That's when I know it's real. I can't reason myself out of my bad mood. My house is a mess. An absolute mess, and the clutter is draining me even more. I can't even set the timer for 15 minutes, Flylady! Blubber*sniff*cry.

Easter :)

2009-04-13T11:59:00.003-06:00

Dying eggs, the arrival of the Easter bunny and the tooth fairy on the same night, new dresses for church, egg hunts with the cousins, dinner with Grandma...what a busy weekend we had. I don't generally spend much time with the extended family, it's just not our thing, nor their thing either. It is nice however when we all get together and enjoy each other's company. We don't get sick of each other, and can genuinely appreciate the time we do have because we don't have expectations. I really hate it when people have unexpressed expectations and think you should be able to read their minds. I am frustrated when people try to change you into what they think you should be. Can't we all just live and let live? I love that about my family. They accept you for what you are and what you can offer. Sure, they might hope for better things or different things in your life, but they take you at face value and don't try to change you. That's what family is to me. A place to love and be loved. We are all strange in our own ways, but we are what we are. I may whine and complain about them, but ultimately I know my family loves me the best way they can, and that means all the world to me.

Disneyland, We Love You!

2009-04-10T20:31:00.002-06:00

We haven't been to California in 5 1/2 years! What a blast to go to Disneyland! Felicity's favorite ride:Splash Mountain, of course! We hit that one 3 times! Grace's favorite ride: She can't really decide, but it must be either Thunder Mountain Railroad, Splash Mountain or Space Mountain! Sawyer's favorite ride: Space Mountain. Mark, as always, loves the Matterhorn, and me, well, I don't really have a favorite ride, but I LOVE all of Fantasyland. We are already talking about next year's spring break. Can you believe I've convinced Mark to take yet another vacation next year? Miracles do happen.

Home Again, Home Again, Jiggety Jig

2009-04-09T22:08:00.003-06:00

We've been home from sunny Southern California for about 1 1/2 hours now. Ahhh. A chance to return to my computer. (hugs)
My son is sitting on the sofa watching Return of the Jedi, hugging his custom-designed light saber and stuffed Ewok, souveniers of our vacation. I smiled at him, and he started to cry.
"What's wrong buddy?"
"I miss California."
"We had so much fun, didn't we?"
"Yes. I've never had so much fun, mom. I wanna go back."

How sweet it is. The simple joys of childhood. The emotional let-down of three fast and furious vacation days at the happiest place on earth. Tonight I feel satisfied as a mom. I gave my children one of the sweetest experiences of their lives. Not Disneyland, not Southern California, but the opportunity to make wonderful memories. My work here is done. At least for tonight.

Getting Ready for Christmas

2008-12-07T17:27:00.002-07:00

Yesterday Mark and I went shopping for Christmas. We had so much fun buying everything we wanted. This year we blew the budget out of the water and just bought everything we saw that we wanted, no holds barred. We'll certainly be paying for it in a month, but we've never done anything so spontaneous and crazy. It was WONDERFUL! I absolutely adored it. I had so much fun throwing things in the cart and just getting it all at the same time. Now I can take my time wrapping presents and enjoying the holiday instead of stressing out over what we are getting and if we will have enough money or time to get it for Christmas.
I am looking forward to a stress-free, enjoyable holiday. Yea for me!

MySpace

2008-12-05T18:57:00.004-07:00

I have to admit it, I am a MySpace gamer. I love the apps on MySpace. I play Sorority Life and Fashion Wars, Mobsters and Mafia Wars, Speed Racing and Gang Wars, oh the list goes on and on. What I can't seem to figure out is what is so addicting about these games! I'm a gaming fool! It cracks me up to be out smacking people and being attacked all day long by total strangers. Alliances with people I would be afraid to meet in a dark alley, fierce competition with my best friends. It is so silly, but so entertaining for me.
Come, join my squad, my posse, my clan. Together we can dominate the world!

Tracy's Profile on MySpace

Plantar Fasciitis

2008-12-04T19:01:00.003-07:00

I have been waking up in the morning with the sorest feet. It hurts so much to walk that I almost cry, and can barely put my weight on my feet. I scheduled an appointment with the Podiatrist, and so today I went.
It turns out that I have something called Plantar Fasciitis. As I understand it, it's when the plantar tendon become less elastic and ruptures, tears, or is just pulled to much and becomes inflamed. It's fairly common.
I was treated with cortisone shots in my right foot, and then my left foot was wrapped with tape. The doctor wants to see which one of these methods, or if either of these are more effective. I also will be needing to get something called orthotics for my shoes. I have a rough idea what these are, but I will need to do some more research about them. I did find out from my insurance company today that they cover orthotics. Apparantly it's not the most common thing for them to cover, so once again, I am grateful for the medical insurance that I do carry. Yea for me.
I am telling you, I am on a slow spiral towards death. If I become terminally ill I am so moving to Oregon so I can get it overwith!

Happy Holidays !?!

2008-12-03T15:41:00.002-07:00

What happened to the carefree fun days of Christmas? It fell away into a river of expectation, and now that I am the driver of the boat (okay, lame metaphor, but go with it),I can't keep it afloat. The lack of funding is my biggest source of complaint. Seriously, what kid needs hundreds of dollars worth of junk? None! Every year I fall into this stupid trap, though. Stupid, Stupid, Stupid. I'm hoping to curtail my spending this year. And yes, I say that every year, but as Christmas morning lurks, I fall into the trap of thinking I haven't gotten enough and 1 or 2 days before Christmas, I double my spending. May this year shine bright with love instead of presents. May I myself recognize the real meaning of Christmas and try to spread it to my children.

Election Results

2008-11-05T15:32:00.003-07:00

I just couldn't let this day pass without mentioning what I was doing when I found out that Barack Obama had won the Presidential Race. I was sitting on my loveseat flipping channels (ABC, CBS, NBC, Fox and CNN - depending on who had a commercial). Mark was playing on the computer, and I yelled - hey! It's official! Barack Obama is the president!
As I watched John McCain give his concession speech, I was impressed. His words felt honest and heartfelt. I believe that he truly will stand behind President Obama and do his best to work for our country. I couldn't help but notice, though, that his campaign party was being held at a high-dollar hotel, with limited amount of space for supporters. Barack Obama, on the other hand, had his party at Grant Park in Chicago, out among the people, and anyone could attend! (As long as you could get through security.) It seemed to say to me that he is for the people. He is in touch with the regular Joe, or Jane as the case may be.
I am excited to see what the next 4 years will be about. I am excited for this opportunity to have some much needed change in our country. I am hopeful it will come to fruition.

Halloween Parade

2008-10-31T11:06:00.003-06:00

I just got home from the Halloween Parade at school. The energy and excitement was palpable. I don't know how the teachers will get anything accomplished today. I think the neighboring school district had the right idea, by just cancelling school today. The kids are so excited. Halloween has gotten out of control, I think. It's not just the simple fun days of trick or treat like when I was a kid. There's parties and events that go on for weeks!
Sprout dressed as a hobo, Panda a mexican dancer and Lulu went as Sacagawea- even carrying Jean-Baptiste on her back!
Tonight we head up to Plain City to see Mark's sister and her children and go trick-or-treating with them. Our neighborhood is not well-lit, and last year there were few houses participating. So, the kids requested we go to a different neighborhood this year. We'll see how that goes!

2008-10-31T00:38:00.005-06:00

This is funny. You should try it.

1. Put your iTunes/Ruckus/Napster/etc on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag 11 friends who might enjoy doing this.

Here are my answers:

IF SOMEONE SAYS “IS THIS OKAY” YOU SAY?
Lips of An Angel - Hinder

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY?
3 Little Birds - Bob Marley
don't worry, about a thing, cuz every little thing will be alright

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Cowboy Take Me Away - Dixie Chicks
but make sure you bring some allergy medication

HOW DO YOU FEEL TODAY?
I Will Love You - Fisher
against my better judgement, I'm sure.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE’S PURPOSE?
I Think God Can Explain - Splendor
hmmmm.....

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
She Will Be Loved - Maroon 5
This really is my motto.

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Hollywood's Not America - Ferras
whoot whoo Hollywood!

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR PARENTS?
Somebody - Depeche Mode
I always wanted to be somebody when I grew up. I guess I should have been more specific.

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT VERY OFTEN?
I Honestly Love You - Olivia Newton-John

WHAT IS 2+2?
Fast Car - Tracy Chapman

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
Fly Away - John Denver
so not true

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Sunshine On My Shoulders - John Denver
ohhh. I sing this song to Sawyer boy.

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Maggie May - Rod Stewart

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Zombie Zoo - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
I think I have reached this lofty goal.

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Wake Me Up When September Ends - Green Day
my husband is laughing right about now

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
When You Say Nothing At All - Allison Kraus
they always told me I talk too much.

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
I'm Yours - Jason Mraz
aww that's kinda sweet

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Lucky - Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat
that is hysterical.

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
Better Than Me - Hinder

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Bed of Roses - Bon Jovi
This is so secret, even I don't know what it is.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Bad Medicine - Bon Jovi
did you hear that Cynthia, Jan and Erika?

WHAT’S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
Wanted Dead or Alive - Bon Jovi
wait a minute. 3 Bon Jovi songs in a row? How random can this be?

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Let Them Be Little - Billy Dean
I knew it. My children will be the death of me.

DOES ANYONE LIKE YOU?
All Because Two People Fell in Love - Brad Paisley
apparantly someone does like me. fool.

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Hysteria - Def Leppard
yes, I would take away the anxiety

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
Butterfly Kisses - Bob Carlisle
ouch! stop it! seriously, Mark. I have a headache.

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Coal Miner's Daughter - Loretta Lynn

Jason Mraz is my new boyfriend

2008-10-30T22:24:00.004-06:00

Mark and I went to the Jason Mraz concert on Tuesday. It was the best concert I have EVER been to. Granted, I have not been to many, but for me it was heavenly. Jason is a fabulous performer. The concert was interactive. He really shared with the audience, he sings with real emotion and you can feel it. You feel connected to him. Okay, maybe not everyone does, but I did.
Now I am in love with him. He is mine. Mine. Mine. If I had stalker tendencies, he would be in real trouble. Or if I weren't married, or way older than him. And he is so healthy, and I'm a chemical imbiber. I like my preservatives and convenience foods. A girl can dream. (If I were younger, thinner, a health nut, had friends in the music industry so I could MEET him, etc.. Or maybe if he were older, fatter, unhealthy and lived in Utah).
A dream is a wish your heart makes....

Addiction

2007-06-26T21:24:00.000-06:00

I'm addicted to caffeine.
Well, Pepsi. Not in all it's varieties, however. I am a tradtionalist. Regular, fully loaded with sugar is the thing for me.
You'd think I'd know better.
My children did an experiment at school. They soaked an hard boiled egg, with the shell on, in a cup of Pepsi overnight. In the morning, it was all brown and gross looking.
Apparantly, this is what happens to your teeth over time if you drink too much soda-pop. Nice. This doesn't motivate me at all. I just like Pepsi too much to care about my teeth. Or my bones. Apparantly caffeine drains calcium out of your bones.
I guess I don't care enough about my bones to stop.
I've tried to quit. I've been successful, for up to 1 year at a time. However, I always return to my guilty pleasure. I don't share with anyone! It's mine. I go to great lengths to keep it hidden. It is a treasure beyond compare for me!
As I sat sipping a tall cold glass with crushed ice, watching the history channel with my husband, I was fascinated with the stories of lost Spanish gold. One of the greatest treasures of the world is yet to be found, or so they say. That night as we were going to bed, my husband peeked under the bed. (I freeze. It's my stash)

What is this? He asks me.
I smile and simply say "Spanish gold."

I'm a Hairy Red-headed Suburbanite

2007-06-25T20:16:00.000-06:00

I'm not bold and wild, I'm more simple and traditional country style, with my own wierd twist every now and again.
It's kinda like being a redhead. You go along living life as normal and predictable, and then WHAM in anger you lash out and show many colors! That's kind of how my house looks, too. It's calm and peaceful, but scattered throughout are funky little items that claim, I'm not the same as everyone else, really I'm not!
I mean seriously. Just because I'm a mom of 3, drive a mini-van, live in a suburb, shop at Wal-mart even though I prefer Target, and my ultimate dream vacation is to take my kids to Disneyworld in Florida, does not make me predictable. Or does it?
I'm just normal and average. Sometimes I wonder if it's a good thing or a bad thing that I'm like everyone else. I have a lot of friends, I make friends easily, most people like me (or pretend to anyway), I can easily find what I'm looking for, don't stand out in a crowd. To me that's good. I also don't know what my "legacy" will be, feel a bit like cattle at times, feel controlled by society and it's mores, and I don't stand out in a crowd. Except for the red hair. These are bad things to me.
I want to be unique, and have people think I'm really cool for wearing birkenstocks, not shaving my legs, and living close to nature. Or not enjoying going to the movies, but prefering to rock in a chair in my backyard. Or for chatting way too much (that's my absolute favorite thing to do in the whole world. chatchatchatchat) I want to be ME and not feel the pressure to be the same as everyone else.
But I find such comfort in familiarity. I find I truly like to blend and be one with my community. I want to be accepted, appreciated, and well-known. I want to know the latest news and dress like it's at least the year 2000. This is important to me as well.
So, I'll still shop at Wal-Mart because I can't afford Target, drive my minivan, and plan a vacation to Disneyworld for someday but I'll be bringing my birkenstocks and hairy legs along the way..............

Games Anyone?

2007-06-23T13:14:00.001-06:00

I have a little known secret that I don't share with just anybody. I like to play games!
Settlers of Cataan
Monopoly
Jewel Quest
Scene It!
Othello
Sequence
Tetris
Diamond Drop

Oh, the list goes on and on.
The sad part is that I don't get to play them very often.

HEAT HEAT HOT!

2007-06-21T21:03:00.000-06:00

Today it is so very hot!
My favorite ways to stay cool in the heat:

1. Eating a Big Stick popsicle. mmmm mmmm good
2. Putting my feet in a bucket of cold water. How refreshing. As the feet go, so goes the rest of the body.
3. Sitting in the shade watching a baseball game, and drinking a cold refreshing beverage. Most likely Pepsi or water.
4. Going to Raging Waters, because the water is always so cold, it hurts! (At least the one in Utah!)
5. Shopping inside an air-conditioned store. Or mall. Not those crazy outdoor malls they've got going in everywhere! Crazy! Hot in the summer, freezing in the winter, sounds like year round misery to me.
6. Going to the movie theater. You'll want to bring a sweater, because it's fabulously cold.
7. Driving in my car with the air-conditioner full blast and some good old John Denver on the radio, or CD, or MP3 player.
8. Sticky, drippy snow-cones at the temporary snow-cone shack, at sunset.
9. Driving up Little Cottonwood Canyon, high in altitude, where the air is cool and sweet.
10. In my home, in my pajamas, air-conditioning on, tall glass of cold water with CRUSHED ice, watching old movies. My favorite is "Rebecca", an Alfred Hitchcock movie.

Exhaustion sets in......

2007-06-14T21:54:00.000-06:00

Exhaustion. Long week. It's Thursday. One more day until the weekend. Will I make it?
I want to play hookey tomorrow sooooo bad!!
There I sit, in an air-conditioned office, with a beautiful view of the Salt Lake Valley, and wish that I could air-condition the ENTIRE outdoors. Or at least the little bubble around me!! Then I could be outside all the time! You know if my employer would supply me with a laptop computer and a cell phone (yeah, I've got my own)I could sit outside and do the work. Perhaps I would get too distracted. That wouldn't be good. Actually, I know I'd be distracted. I'd be watching all the little squirrels run around.
Hmmm. Maybe I could set up a squirrel feeder outside my office window, and watch them fight and chase each other. That'd probably distract me too. I mean, do you want to look at the computer screen, or little brown fuzzies?
That reminds me of when we were living in a teeny little apartment in Indiana. My husband, my 3 kids, me, 1 dog, and 1 cat. The squirrels were EVERYWHERE! They were constantly outside our front door. The kids laughed at one and named him "Stubby the Guinea Pig" because the poor little critter had lost his tail. And he was fat. And our cat liked to chase him. The cat, her name was Mrs. Nesbitt, killed some of Stubby's friends.
These poor little creatures are not blessed with large brains, and it always ends in their demise.
It was summer, a cool summer night. As we sat outside on our porch, and chatted with the neighbors, we heard a huge explosion! It was like KABLAAM!! NUCULOID WAR! So all of us went tearing into the backyard, and there was a squirrel on the ground. Stiff as a board. We looked up and saw he ate through some electrical wire. That's when we realized our power was out.
Do you know what summer in Indiana is like? Heat. Humidity. Corn Beetles. No power means no air conditioning. Once again this has me wishing for the ability to air-condition the whole outdoors, or at least the bubble around ME!!

Somedays I just HATE!

2007-06-11T21:57:00.000-06:00

Okay, so I have a tiny little storage closet for an office, with stuff stored everywhere so I can hardly move around. My co-worker however has an office about 3 times larger, and tons of work space etc. So, occassionally I have to do some work in her office because it's bigger.

So, last Friday, I left out ONE piece of paper on her desk and I didn't put the chair back so that it was completely under the table, it was out about an inch. (Okay, it was FRIDAY, I totally wanted to get outta there, for hell's sake!)

So, anyway, she sends me this email that says she tries to keep her office clean and tidy, completely inferring that my office is a mess. (well, duh! it's a storage closet with a desk. It's always a mess because no one ever puts things back where they belong in my office, but I digress)She also said that when I leave things all over (remember one piece of paper!) it is very frustrating, and she's tired of cleaning up after me, and that in the future I should clean up after myself, because she had to throw away ONE PIECE OF PAPER, and push a chair in one inch.

Some people are soooooo picky. I think she has OCD. Who else is so obsessive except for Monk????????

I just want to sneak over to the office tonight and set out a pencil on her desk. I left before her, and she won't know who did it. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (that's my evil laugh)

My home

2007-06-11T20:57:00.000-06:00

I've moved around a lot.

California.

Indiana.

Utah.

Well, maybe not so many places, but all kinds of different spaces!

And I've brought my kids along with me.

You know what I learned???

Home is what you make it, it's people you love, and stuff you love, and that's all you need.

It doesn't matter if you're in a huge house on five acres, or a tiny apartment you can hardly breathe in, or sharing space with your mother, or your best friend.

I know what home is when I'm there.

It's not a place, it's a feeling, a memory of good times and good people.

It's where you are most comfortable. Sometimes, it's only in your mind (of course then you never have to leave home!)

Home is but a beautiful memory.